College has taught me that it’s okay to be alone, that it doesn’t matter if you look like a “loner”. It’s okay to just sit and drink tea and watch people. You don’t have to be on your phone acting like you’re talking to people, or reading a book that you don’t want to read just because it looks like you’re doing something. Those moments when you’re by yourself, you realize that you have everything you need. Even if you’d rather be with people, you’re okay. You’re really, honestly, okay. Nothing is wrong with you. No one is judging you. No one is thinking, “Wow, look at that freak over there.” No one cares. Breathe. Do what you want. Enjoy the moment. Just be.
Learning to be alone with oneself is extremely satisfying, but it can take a lot of work depending on the person. We are socially and culturally encourage to be with other people at all time, swimming in relationships.
“I think it’s very healthy to spend some time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.” – Oscar Wilde
So what exactly is the difference between “alone” and “lonely”? Thought Catalog does a beautifully poetic job of explaining that here. I will only post a an excerpt, but if you’d like to read the full thing, click the link!
For me, being alone is something I choose. Loneliness is feeling alone when I haven’t chosen it. When you’re alone, remind yourself that it’s because you choose to be. It really is a choice.
This absolutely beautiful poem by Andrea Davis changed my views on being alone. I was always self-conscious about it, but now I embrace it. PLEASE watch this video. It’s incredible! Read the words to the poem when you’re done.
Watch that in your solitude you do not become lazy. Having a day or two where you do nothing can be healing and lovely, but don’t allow it to turn into a week or month of doing so. There is much to be done. Don’t waste your youth or your time on this earth by being content in doing nothing.
There is great value in being alone. And handling it well is a beautiful thing.
What do you guys and gals think of being alone? What is your definition of this word compared to loneliness? What do you like to do during your “me” time?