“It’s not you, it’s my schedule.”
Preface: I am not flaunting my unattached status.
Technically, I’m married. To school, that is. It isn’t the healthiest relationship, as it takes up all of my time and gives little in return.
Plus, come January 2015, any and all free time will be filled with Columbus 2015 Marathon training. Sorry, boys. I’m not in pursuit of my sole mate. Er, soul mate.
For those of you who are, lace up! Forget meeting potential lovers at hipster coffee shops and local bars; perhaps it’s time to take out your running shoes and sign up for the next 5K.
Runners…. we’re a special breed. If you want to have fun, be healthy, spend time outdoors, travel, live passionately, and be with someone dedicated, then a runner is for you.
So you wanna date a runner?
Here are 21 things you should know first:
1. Short shorts. Runners wear them. Killer legs usually come with. Did I mention baby got back? (from all those hill sprints of course!)
2. We know great music, podcasts, and audiobooks. Sixteen-mile run? Why yes, I do have an extensive playlist to power me through the entire thing.
3. We know the importance of praise and positive feedback.
4. We are dedicated and determined. A lazy person does not make a good runner. A dedicated person has dreams, turns them into goals, and rocks the socks off them. This is a runner.
5. We’re predominately happy people. All of those miles outside aren’t just for fun. Runners get high the natural way. All those endorphins create a euphoric feeling.
6. We love food. Foodie is our middle name. Do calories even count when we log so many miles?? Runners, on average, need to be fed every 2 hours. Otherwise we enter a state known as RUNGRY.
7. We are strong (and bad ass). Our strength enables us to push ourselves to achieve the seemingly impossible, like running in the snow and pouring rain or going a longer distance than ever before.
8. Any and all foot fetishes should just be checked at the door. You really don’t want to know what happens to feet that log double-digit miles in a week.
9. Be prepared for some gross conversations about bodily functions.
10. I wouldn’t romantically join us in the bath on the spur of the moment. Chances are we’re taking an ice bath.
11. Flowers and chocolates are nice; however, pedicures, massages, running clothes, covering our race entry fee, cheering us on with a cheesy sign, and handing us a banana at the finish is real love.
12. If we go missing for four hours and don’t answer our phone, don’t suspect us of cheating. We’re just marathon training.
13. Say goodbye to lazy weekend mornings. We will be up and out of the door before you can say, “Coffee.”
14. Are you a jealous person? There WILL be days when running comes first.
15. If you can give a quality massage, then you, my friend, are in for life.
16. We’re used to cheering on anyone and everyone we meet who runs, so no matter what your goals or dreams, we’ll be right there being your biggest fan the whole way.
17. Running is a proven method of stress relief. It’s nice to date someone who knows how to blow off steam in a healthy way.
18. We’ll know all of the interesting things about your area. Long runs outdoors give us a chance to notice all the intriguing spots you might have overlooked.
19. After a long run, we will probably collapse on your couch for the next 5 hours.
20. We like alone time. We’ve grow comfortable with spending time by ourselves and our own thoughts.
21. Let’s face it: we’re the best bunch of happy-crazy people you’ll ever meet. We basically run the world…pun intended.
Date a runner. We’ll take you on this crazy journey with us.